As promised before, here is the email sent to me by one of you guys. I'm still in awe to this day why he chose me and THP as a venue for his letter. At first I didn't know how to react. My first thought was, why me? Why send me a letter and ask me to share it on my blog when clearly my blogs aren't built for people who seek advises. There are blogs which were created for this purpose and I can't help but wonder why this guy chose me.
Then it dawned on me that this can be a great idea for the blog. I feature just about everything here. Depends mostly on what fans like, and now for the first time ever, a fan sent me an actual letter, with an actual content, without the usual pictures or contributions or requests asking for a video link... a fan asking for an advice and wanting to share his story. This is a milestone for THP. Perhaps I've touched my fan's heart in more ways than one... I don't know, but let me try this you guys...
Let's call him Justin... Guys, please do note that I've made certain adjustments to Justin's letter so that everyone can appreciate it.
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Hey Hudson,
My name is Justin and I'm an enthusiast of your blog. Your blog pictures are great and so are the videos you feature in it.
I was hoping though that you could help me with a dilemma I'm facing. I've already shared all these with the closest of my friends and each of them gave me advises. Somehow, I still don't know what to do.
It's about my partner. We are a couple for almost five years now, and we've been living together for three. Like most couples who have been together for that long, everything slows down, especially sex. But for me, I really don't care. I love this guy so much and what we have is a gold mine, something that not even a heterosexual couple can sustain nowadays.
Ten months ago, I've noticed certain changes in his behavior. Whenever we talk, he seem so distant and whenever I kiss him, there's always this slight hesitation in his eyes.
Of course I suspected infidelity. But like any person who is in love, I chose to trust him. Nothing out of the ordinary changed except for these two distinct behaviors of his.
Then, a month ago, a friend of mine confided that he had seen my partner with a guy, thrice to be exact... always in a particular mall in Ortigas... and always with the same guy. He first thought that my partner was with a friend, but his most recent sighting of them, they were holding hands. I turned a deft ear on him but somehow he had convinced me to see it for myself. He accompanied me one Sunday afternoon to that mall where they were always seen together and there... I saw my partner with the other guy, who turned out to be an acquaintance of mine and who knows that my partner and I are a couple... my partner's arms wrapped around his waist while they walk side by side, caring not a bit on what others might think about them. My partner... looking so happy... the happiest I've seen him by far.
At that moment, my world crumbled. Everything I held dearly for 5 years, gone in just a few seconds.
I didn't do anything violent at that time. I simply sent him a text message, telling him that I saw him with the other guy. He didn't reply.
That afternoon he didn't come home and Lord knows how I cried my heart out. When he did so the following morning, he told me that he and the other guy were over and he beg me to start anew.
I've decided to give him a chance, Hudson. But to this day, I know he is still seeing the other guy.
I dealt with just about every emotion there is known to man. I felt anger. I felt pain. But most of all, I felt unwanted, unsuited, ugly and down.
...But I love him so much to give up everything now...
What will I do?
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Justin, first of all I want to thank you for the email you've sent me. Thank you for trusting me with your story. Thank you for trusting THP with your experience.
What I have to say are these.
1. Love isn't a one way street.
I know a lot will disagree on me on this, but hey, we are only humans. We love simply because we wanted to be love in return. Your partner is a fool for not seeing what a wonderful person you are. Being able to give him another chance, and continuing to love him despite his cheating and all. I don't know you both personally, or the reasons surrounding your partner's faithlessness to you, but if he continues to see the other while claiming that he still loves you, that a sign, sister. A sign that he loves... only himself. Don't be afraid to leave him behind as you can find true love on another street! It will not be easy but you have your great family and wonderful friends to be there for you.
2. Relationships aren't based on Numbers.
I somehow get this feeling that you're clinging on to the douchebag, despite your better judgement, simply because you've spent 5 of your wonderful years with him. Time is indeed gold and you can't turn back the clock. But reality is that he cheated, he continues to cheat and you're hurt because of it. If you've done your part and you know that the relationship is irreparable, you've got to learn to move on, deary, despite the years you've spent with him.
3. There's always a rainbow at the end of every storm.
We all suffer separation anxiety whenever something ends and relationships aren't excluded. Always remember, Justin, if you gave it your best shot, it didn't work out, then it isn't for you. Your partner (I hope soon to be ex!) was thrown to your path so that you may learn from him. Find out what that is and when you do, you'll rise up a better, stronger person.
Lots of love,
Hudson
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